1. |
Hello Vincent Hello
00:17
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I thought I knew a Winston
Turned out he was a Vincent
How ya doin', Vincent?
Hello
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2. |
Luv Jail
02:37
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Luv jail
Guilty as hell now
Luv jail
Wanna be held with
Out Bail
Don’t wanna get out of
L*U*V J*A*I*L
Luv jail
Here with my wife in
Luv jail
20 to life? I say
Oh well
Isn't it nice in
L*U*V J*A*I*L
ROCK!
Lock me up
Throw away the key
I’m makin’ sweet luv
In the luv penitentiary
No regrets
Guilty as charged
Doin’ hard time
Livin’ it large
Luv jail
No parole now
Luv jail
Relationship goals now
All hail
The rock and the roll now
L*U*V J*A*I*L
Luv jail
Serving my time in
Luv jail
If it’s a crime then
Oh well
Not a lot rhymes with
L*U*V J*A*I*L
ROCK!
Send me up the river
Lock me in the hoosegow
Me and my baby
We're in the jailhouse now
We like it here
In our cell
Makin’ sweet luv
In the county hotel
Luv jail
Don’t need no jailbreak
Luv jail
Don’t need no file cake
Hard sell
Like Donald E Westlake
L*U*V J*A*I*L
Luv jail
Bang the hammer
Luv jail
Throw me in the slammer
Oh hell
Pardon my grammar
L*U*V J*A*I*L
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3. |
||||
[Burger monkeys] out of their minds
[Burger monkeys] waving their behinds
[Burger monkeys] can’t read no signs
[Burger monkeys] flinging the poo
[Burger monkeys] fling it on you
[Burger monkeys] what can you do
Chorus
Running around like a gawdamn animal
Burger monkeys ain’t got no shame
Running around like a gawdamn animal
One more time I’m gonna take some names
[Burger monkeys] dancing on the tables
[Burger monkeys] yanking on the cables
[Burger monkeys] ripping off the labels
[Burger monkeys] stoked and battle ready
[Burger monkeys] looking pretty unsteady
[Burger monkeys] one of them is named Eddie
Chorus
Running around like a gawdamn animal
Burger monkeys ain’t got no shame
Running around like a gawdamn animal
Think they live in a videogame
Running around like a gawdamn animal
Ain’t nobody gonna take the blame
Running around like a gawdamn animal
One more time I’m gonna take some names
[Burger monkeys] can I take it to the bridge
[Burger monkeys] I wanna take it to the bridge
[Burger monkeys] coming up to the bridge
THE BRIDGE
[Burger monkeys] disturbin’ the peace
[Burger monkeys] sloppin’ the grease
[Burger monkeys] on work release
[Burger monkeys] want the banana boat
[Burger monkeys] want the root beer float
[Burger monkeys] Jim that’s all she wrote
Chorus
Running around like a gawdamn animal
Burger monkeys ain’t got no shame
Running around like a gawdamn animal
Think they live in a videogame
Running around like a gawdamn animal
Ain’t nobody gonna take the blame
Running around like a gawdamn animal
One more time I’m gonna take some names
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4. |
||||
PART 1: HONG KONG TO HELSINKI
Prologue:
Moscow on the left
Tula on the right
Red-light wingtips
Flashing in the night
Verse:
John Stewart tryin’ to make Stevie Nicks
Rock drummers all got 10-inch sticks
The president of Iceland’s blocking the bus
Moist towelettes for each and every one of us
Chorus:
Eating Neapolitan Moose x 3
No such thing as moose abuse (Moose Abuse - huh!)
PART 2: HELSINKI TO HONG KONG
Prologue:
Scandinavian flight attendants
In the airport in Helsinki
Armed with six hot dogs apiece
And you thought that I was kinky
Verse:
Eddie Murphy is the Nutty Professor
When I grow up I wanna be a crossdresser
Eight miles high and nothing to do
I think I’m turning into a kangaroo
Chorus:
Eating Neapolitan Moose x 3
No such thing as moose abuse (Moose Abuse - huh!)
Epilogue:
Eating Neapolitan Moose x 8
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5. |
||||
How did you lose your ball?
How did you write on the wall?
How did you get through that door?
How did you do that to the floor?
How did you get up there?
How did you move that chair?
How did you get that job?
How did you clobber the mob?
How did you get outside?
How did you get untied?
How did you get that beer?
How did these bones get here?
How did you make the scene?
How did yr face turn green?
How did you become queen?
How did yr face turn green?
How do you like them beans?
How did yr face turn green?
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6. |
My Puppy's Going Psycho
05:13
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V1:
My Puppy’s going psycho
It sounds crazy, I know
But have you seen her lately?
Only she’s been acting strangely
She thinks that she’s a kitty
Or worse, G Gordon Liddy
Chewin’ on her toenails
And paranoid as all hell
Chorus:
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho!
V2:
My Puppy’s going psycho
It’s not a pretty sight, no!
She’s going off the deep end
Totally around the bend
She’s been having nightmares
Evil rabbits everywhere
Hiding under the bed
and hopped up on Sudafed
Chorus:
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho!
Bridge:
She’s totally wacko, she’s completely loony tunes
She’s mad as a hatter, and barking at the moon
Satanic rabbits are dancing in her brain
She’s on the crazy train
She’s insane in the membrane
Lead madness
V3:
My Puppy’s going psycho
She’s gone into the aggro
She’s in the mouth of madness
With no forwarding address
She’s been hearing voices
She’s obsessed with James Joyce, yeah
There’s a bustle in her hedgerow
It’s paranoia-go-go
Chorus:
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho-oh-oh-oh!
My Puppy’s going psycho!
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7. |
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8. |
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Kawaii Five-0
What’s their jurisdiction? I don’t know
Kawaii Five-0
Book em Danno go go go!
Kawaii Five-0
Got no badges but they’re ready to go
Kawaii Five-0
Book em Danno go go go!
Kawaii on the east side
Kawaii on the west side
Here comes the shakedown
All the way from downtown
Kawaii gonna suck you in
Lay you down and tuck you in
Next thing you know you’ve been deputized
Good thing I could use the exercise
Kawaii Five-0
Cute as the dickens and ready to roll
Kawaii Five-0
Book em Danno go go go!
Kawaii Five-0
Dontcha feel safer when they’re on patrol
Kawaii Five-0
Book em Danno go go go!
Kawaii in the morning
Kawaii in the evening
Don't forget the tea time
Especially the tea time
Pastries cheese and coffee
Root beer extra frosty
Quaff it all down with authority
Kawaii rearranges your priorities
Always outnumbered but never outsized
Layin’ down the law with their anime eyes
Kawaii Five-0
One for the money, two for the show
Kawaii Five-0
Book em Danno go go go!
Kawaii Five-0
Got the situation under control
Kawaii Five-0
Book em Danno go go go!
Kawaii on the outside
Cujo on the inside
Now gimme a Kawaiian Punch!
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9. |
A Cat With Human Teeth
03:53
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Verse 1
Went to pay my gas bill
Saw a cat with human teeth
It’s not a metaphor
I mean a cat with human teeth
He was curled up on the printer
Orange as a tangerine
Eyes as wide as the ocean
Hopped up on caffeine
Bridge
I wish he’d never smiled at me
Things like that can’t be unseen
Chorus:
It was a cat with human teeth
Got a smile beyond belief
It was a cat with human teeth
Yr in danger so I’ll be brief
Verse 2
I offered him a Slim Jim
Cos what else was I gonna do?
See a cat with teeth like that
You kinda wanna see him chew
He nodded and gave me two thumbs up
Then he grabbed me by the collar
His eyes and mouth opened extra-wide
That’s when I began to holler
Bridge
I don’t wanna be a snack
I think I want my Slim Jim back
Chorus:
It was a cat with human teeth
Takes suspension of disbelief
It was a cat with human teeth
Whatever you do don’t give him beef
Verse 3
I thought that would be the end of me
Devoured by a freaky cat
The cashier was my hero
She put a stop to all that
Grabbed the cat and put him back
Then she smacked me upside the head
“Never feed a cat with teeth like that,
“58 dollars,” she said.
Bridge
The moral of this story of mine
This is why I pay my bills online
Chorus
It was a cat with human teeth
Got a smile beyond belief
It was a cat with human teeth
Whatever you do, don’t call him Chief
It was a cat with human teeth
Wants you for an aperitif
It was a cat with human teeth
Whatever you do don’t give him beef
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10. |
Find The Fat Dog
04:30
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Verse 1
Is he under the bed?
Is he out in the yard?
Is he behind the couch
with the National Guard?
Find the fat dog!
Is he in the kitchen?
Is he in Brazil?
Is he on the phone?
Is he over the hill?
Find the fat dog!
Bridge:
Do you see him? No no no!
Do you see him? No no no!
Do you see him? No no no!
Well go and find him! Go go go!
Chorus x 2
Find the fat dog! (Man, where’d he go?)
Which one’s the fat dog? (Man, I dunno!)
Find the fat dog! (Get into gear!)
Where is that dog? (Man, he ain’t here!)
Verse 2
Is he the one on the left?
Is he the one on the right?
Is he taking a bath?
Is he on the next flight?
Find the fat dog!
Is he on the porch?
Is he in the hall?
Is he raiding the fridge?
Is he on the ball?
Find the fat dog!
Bridge:
Do you see him? No no no!
Do you see him? No no no!
Do you see him? No no no!
Well go and find him! Go go go!
Chorus x 2
Find the fat dog! (Man, where’d he go?)
Which one’s the fat dog? (Man, I dunno!)
Find the fat dog! (Get into gear!)
Where is that dog? (Man, he ain’t here!)
Breakdown rap:
Don’t worry about it
It doesn’t matter which one he is
He’s alright and he’s okay
and he’s just fine the way he is
Is he fat or is he thin?
It’s not that big an issue to him
He just wants to play with you
and a ball, and maybe something to chew
Bridge:
Do you see him? No no no!
Do you see him? No no no!
Do you see him? No no no!
Well go and find him! Go go go!
Chorus x 2
Find the fat dog! (Man, where’d he go?)
Which one’s the fat dog? (Man, I dunno!)
Find the fat dog! (Get into gear!)
Where is that dog? (Man, he ain’t here!)
Hey fat dog! Come out and play! x 8
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11. |
||||
CHORUS
Pastries cheese and coffee
Mmmm mmmm good
Pastries cheese and coffee
All up in yr neighborhood
1. THE PASTRY MENU
Croissants, pineapple buns
Sunday go-to-meetin’ buns
Berliners and cream puffs
Danishes and nun’s puffs
Bear claws and donuts
Beaver tails and cronuts
Swiss rolls, jelly rolls
Eleven kinds of muffins, yo
Macarons and Brownies
Crepe suzettes and Dorayakis
Éclairs, tarts and Strudels
Cakes? Oh we got oodles
Cheese cakes and moon cakes
Bundt cakes and bum cakes
Pound cakes and opera cakes
Coffee cakes and pancakes
Don’t forget the banoffee pie!
I’m all about the banoffee pie
CHORUS
Pastries cheese and coffee
Mmmm mmmm good
Pastries cheese and coffee
In Brussels, Rome or Hollywood
2. THE CHEESE MENU
Cream cheese, cottage cheese
Bath cheese and basket cheese
Beer cheese, breakfast cheese
Venezuelan beaver cheese
Cojack and Colby-Jack
Pepper Jack, Sonoma Jack
Of course the Monterey Jack
Got more cheese than that, Jack
Edam, Munster, Cheddar
Swiss, Paneer and Cheshire
Gloucester, Gouda, Provolone
Mozzarella Roqueforte
Gorgonzola Camembert
“Cougar Gold?” Right over there
Stilton, Feta, Yorkshire Blue
Got some Cornish Pepper too
Don’t forget the Hereford Hop
Everybody do the Hereford Hop
CHORUS
Pastries cheese and coffee
That’s a good breakfast
If Johnny don’t want none
That’s more for the rest of us
3. THE COFFEE MENU
Black coffee, white coffee
Irish coffee, Turkish coffee
Filtered, drip and French press
Percolated? Hell yes
Espresso, Americano
Cortado, Cafe Cubano
Café Latte, Café Mocha
Chai Latte and Cafe Zorro
Doppio ristretto
Lungo cappuccino
Macchiato Antoccino
Frappa Wappa Slappaccino
Nanyang, kopi susu
‘Ca Phe Sua Da’ for you
Espressino, Eiskaffee,
Liqueur coffee, yay yay yay
Don't forget the Cafe Bombon
Make mine a Cafe Bombon
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12. |
A Medley Of Muffins, Man
03:17
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Banäna Deäthmüffins Hong Kong
Banäna Deäthmüffins (formerly known as Wet Riser, Thundernuts, Penguin Salad, Penguin Lust, Penguin Rock City, Jefferson Penguins, Blue Oyster Penguins, Pink Penguins, Street-Fighting Penguins, Kung Fu Penguins, Jethro Penguin, Gay Penguins, Sassy Penguins, Edgy Penguins, Itchy Penguins, Penguin Masters, and Average White Banjos) are the official house band of Team Frog International. ... more
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