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Political Songs For Miley Cyrus To Sing

by Banäna Deäthmüffins

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1.
Standing in the station Holding up placards Making introductions Bored and beautiful No need for small talk Just follow the instructions Keeping it simple Six little words Don’t need no conjunctions They got the looks They got the taffeta They got the gumption BRIDGE Pretty people got all the money Yr just holding it until they need it So you might as well hand it over What’s the matter buddy, can’t you read? CHORUS Give us money, we are pretty x 4 Is it the First World? Is it the Third World? Is it a prank? Is it performance art? Is it political? Is it something you drank? It doesn’t matter Just give them something They can put in the bank Simple transaction Just hand them yr cash They won’t even say thanks BRIDGE Album cover waiting to happen Real or fake, it’s nothing new If you want the pretty, you gotta pay and that says less about them than it does about you CHORUS Give us money, we are pretty x 8 Truth is beauty Beauty is power Power is truth Up in yr face Like twin soothsayers Saying the sooth Beauty adds value In a society Obsessed with youth They know the deal And they got yr money So there goes yr proof BRIDGE Album cover waiting to happen It’s just the truth fresh-frozen for two They hold the cards and they hold the power How much you give them is up to you CHORUS Give us money, we are pretty x 12
2.
He’s too skinny, She’s too fat Look at the losers, Looking like that That’s too small, That’s too big You can’t win, The game is rigged Everyone says that looks don’t matter But we insult each other when we start getting fatter Throwing other people’s feelings under the bus Just in case they try to do it to us BRIDGE Nobody’s perfect and neither are you We could change it right now and we know what to do But we’re too afraid of what the neighbors will think To break the chain and rewrite the link CHORUS We hate ourselves, That’s a fact Don’t know what we’re missing, But we want it back Can’t live with the fact that we don't look like that So all we do is hold each other back VERSE Selling ourselves and each other short I’ll see you in hell or I’ll see you in court Tearing down people less perfect than you To bump yr own ego up a notch or two We keep falling for the same old traps That we set for ourselves and dropped in our own laps Reinforcing standards we can never attain Unless yr loaded, lucky or have no shame BRIDGE Nobody’s perfect and neither are you We could change it right now and we know what to do But we’re too afraid of what the neighbors will think To break the chain and rewrite the link CHORUS We hate ourselves, That’s a fact Don’t know what we’re missing, But we want it back Can’t live with the fact that we don't look like that So all we do is hold each other back VERSE Too skinny too fat too bad It could have been the best thing you ever had We've lost the plot, we’re off the rails We’ve bottled our vanity and put it on sale Would you rather be lonely than settle for less When less is really more – but I digress Beauty sex and love is right where you find it Conformity’s the barrier, don’t hide behind it BRIDGE Nobody’s perfect and neither are you We could change it right now and we know what to do But we’re too afraid of what the neighbors will think To break the chain and rewrite the link CHORUS We hate ourselves, That’s a fact Don’t know what we’re missing, But we want it back Can’t live with the fact that we don't look like that So all we do is hold each other back
3.
Who moved my cheese? It was right here a minute ago I know, because that’s where I always keep it Now it’s over there and now I gotta move it back What’s the point of cheese if someone’s just gonna move it? BRIDGE Oooooooooohhhh oooohh! Never move another man’s cheese Oooooooooohhhh oooohh! Never move another man’s cheese Who moved my cheese? Does it matter? Yes it does! Was it her? Was it him? Was it you? Was it them? Used to be a time when people left yr cheese alone HEY! While I was singing that, somebody went and moved it again BRIDGE Oooooooooohhhh oooohh! Never move another man’s cheese Oooooooooohhhh oooohh! Never move another man’s cheese CHORUS I want cheese! (You can’t have it cos it’s gone) Where did it go? (I dunno! I dunno!) Bring me my cheese! (Put it back where you found it) This ain’t no science project Cheese isn’t just an object Are we men or are we mice? Moving cheese just isn’t very nice! [BREAK] Who moved my cheese? This is really inconvenient Stupid cheese movers! Man, there oughta be a law! How would you like it if I came to yr place and moved yr cheese around? YEAH! That’s what I thought... BRIDGE Oooooooooohhhh oooohh! Never move another man’s cheese Oooooooooohhhh oooohh! Never move another man’s cheese [CHORUS]: I want cheese! (You can’t have it cos it’s gone) Where did it go? (I dunno! I dunno!) Bring me my cheese! (Put it back where you found it) This ain’t no science project Cheese isn’t just an object Are we men or are we mice? Moving cheese just isn’t nice! You know what you are? Yr a cheese mover, baby! You know what you are? Yr a cheese mover, baby! You know what you are? Yr a cheese mover, baby! Never move another man’s cheese!
4.
Memes are bullshit Memes are propaganda Memes don’t tell the truth Don’t pass them on I do not care What party you vote for If you forward memes Then I’m talking to you Memes are created To intentionally mislead you They’re not educational They just make you stupid Don't assume they're true Just because you believe them If you believe them Yr a gullible idjit Memes are bullshit Memes are propaganda Memes don’t tell the truth Don’t pass them on You probably think That this song ain’t about you If you forward memes Then I’m talking to you Those memes you keep posting They’re chock full of nonsense Or exaggerations Or misleading statements And if you repost them Without fact-checking them Yr just participating In yr own manipulation Memes are bullshit Memes are propaganda Memes don’t tell the truth Don’t pass them on BREAK Memes are bullshit Memes are propaganda Memes don’t tell the truth Don’t pass them on Oh what’s the use Yr not even listening I know yr not listening Because you keep on reposting them Because it’s easier than thinking Or doing the research Anyone can do it Even your cat Memes are bullshit Memes are propaganda Memes don’t tell the truth Don’t pass them on Memes are bullshit Memes are propaganda Memes don’t tell the truth Don’t pass them on
5.
INTRO He spent 20 minutes on the first slide He spent 20 minutes on the second slide He spent 20 minutes on the third slide 20 more slides to go! Oh no! VERSE 1 Give him one minute, he’ll take twenty Hope you got the time cos he’s got plenty He can talk for hours, not say a damn thing Is anybody here still listening? BRIDGE On and on and on he goes Where he’ll stop nobody knows Take it easy, make it hard Dump it all in someone else’s backyard VERSE 2 He takes his time, he’s a rambling man He’s got PowerPoint and a 30-point plan New adventures in minutiae He could go on like this all day BRIDGE On and on and on he goes Where he’ll stop nobody knows It happened here and we all know why This is the best govt money can buy CHORUS Do the Govt Wonk It’s a ministerial sensation Do the Govt Wonk Gridlocking the entire nation BREAK VERSE 3 He’ll bring yr committee to a grinding halt If you get bored it’s yr own damn fault Never met a problem he couldn’t complicate He’ll get right on it but you gotta wait BRIDGE On and on and on he goes Where he’ll stop nobody knows This is not an anti-govt song But it’s easy to see yr doing it wrong CHORUS Do the Govt Wonk If you can’t do it you can always fake it Do the Govt Wonk With yr mouth wide open and yr eyes all vacant Do the Govt Wonk Laying down the policy in monotone Do the Govt Wonk Just keep talking ‘til they leave you alone Do the Govt Wonk x 8
6.
Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk Don't want no metaphors Don't want no similes Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk Don't want no flimflam Don't want no flibbertyjib Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk CHORUS 1 Don't want expert forecasts Don't want speculation Put away yr poetic license And yr second-hand observation Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk Don't want no weasel words Don't want no 50-dollar words Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk Don't want no claptrap Don't want no twaddle Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk CHORUS 2 Yr truth is my fiction Cos it doesn’t fit my reality I’m certain of what’s in front of me Everything else is hyperbole Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk BREAK Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk Don't want no mumbo jumbo Don't want no fiddle-faddle Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk Don't want no poppycock Don't want no double-talk Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk CHORUS 3 I just want the facts, ma’am I want objectivity I don’t have to sit here and listen To your biased subjectivity Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk OUTRO Don't want no bunk Don't want no jive Don’t want no fancy patter Don't want no balderdash Don't want no jabber Don't want no rubbish Don't want no tripe Don't want no runaround Don't want no hogwash Don't want no hooey Don't want no gibberish Don't want no gobbledygook Gimme the straight talk Gimme the straight talk
7.
Let It Suck 03:00
When you have a bad day Or someone makes you mad You say this really sucks But why is that so bad If someone goes down on you It makes you really happy Why do you compare it To a thing that’s really crappy BRIDGE So let’s flip it on its head Make somebody’s day Accentuate the positive Join me when I say: CHORUS It sucks and I’m happy It sucks and that’s okay It sucks and I don’t mind at all Have a sucky day! Sucking is a good thing With the proper attitude It’s a new philosophy To suck is always good!

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Recorded and mixed at Terribly Frog Studios from November 2015 to October 2016

credits

released October 16, 2016

John “dEFROG” Deäthmüffin: guitar, vocals
Beth Deäthmüffin: guitar, backing vocals
Seth Deäthmüffin: bass, backing vocals
Goo Deäthmüffin: percussion things

Producer: Katie Fletcher
Svengali: Randi Panda
Cover star: Bonbon

Lyrics by dEFROG
Music by Banäna Deäthmüffins

©2016 Terribly Frog Music. Derechos Reservados!

PRODUCTION NOTE: Some songs contain words that yr parents yell at the TV during presidential election debates. That's no reason not to listen to them. We're just saying.

THANKS: to everyone who likes us or pretends to like us cos we're friends and stuff.

Banäna Deäthmüffins uses Anboy guitars EXCLUSIVELY because they want the best they can afford, or really whatever they can afford, so close enough.

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Banäna Deäthmüffins Hong Kong

Banäna Deäthmüffins (formerly known as Wet Riser, Thundernuts, Penguin Salad, Penguin Lust, Penguin Rock City, Jefferson Penguins, Blue Oyster Penguins, Pink Penguins, Street-Fighting Penguins, Kung Fu Penguins, Jethro Penguin, Gay Penguins, Sassy Penguins, Edgy Penguins, Itchy Penguins, Penguin Masters, and Average White Banjos) are the official house band of Team Frog International. ... more

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